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Blaxploitation
Double Feature
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Review
by
Brian Lindsey
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Gestapo
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5 |
Six
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2 |
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1 |
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By
the mid-1970s the Blaxploitation trend was quickly running out
of steam. Classics like Shaft,
Coffy, and Foxy
Brown had already shot their cultural bolt. With
its latest double feature DVD, Diamond Entertainment pairs two
flicks from this period that really scrape the bottom
of the Blaxploitation barrel: The Black
Gestapo and The Black Six.
Both flicks are pretty bad; Gestapo,
helmed by "Roughie" director Lee Frost (The
Defilers), is the more professionally made of the two. It's
also more violent and sleazy, positively wallowing in what by
today's standards is the antithesis of Political Correctness.
Six —
an inept melding of Biker and Blaxploitation themes featuring
a cast of N.F.L. pros —
nearly salvages itself with a few cheesilicious moments to amuse
the hardcore schlock aficionado. (Well, maybe.)
Black Gestapo
is an inferior example of the genre but the gonzo concept makes
it a must-see for Blaxploitation fans. It has the distinction
of being the only such pic to use newsreel footage from the
Third Reich for a title sequence. (Never in Adolf's wildest
dreams could the dictator have ever imagined his visage backed
by "wocka-chikka wocka-chikka" funk music.) In Los
Angeles, The People's Army is a uniformed, nonviolent "militia"
that provides community services such as health care and drug
treatment to poor, disenfranchised blacks. Its benevolent leader,
"General" Darryl Ahmed (Rod Perry), is too concerned
with raising funds for the group's charitable work to keep a
close eye on his second-in-command, "Colonel" Koja
(Charles Robinson, Mac from TV's Night Court). Koja thinks
Ahmed is weak for not using the People's Army as a strike force
to rid the ghetto of white mobsters who run the drug, prostitution
and gambling rackets. When Ahmed's girlfriend is accosted by
Syndicate thugs, Koja persuades him to authorize the formation
of a security squad for defensive purposes. But the ambitious
Koja has bigger plans. With Ahmed unaware of what he's doing
he lays the groundwork for the creation of a private army answerable
only to him. In their first action Koja and his troops break
into the house of the Syndicate's most brutal enforcer, Vito
(Superchick's
Phil Hoover), surprising the man as he's taking a bath. Koja
cuts his balls off with a straight razor and flushes them down
the toilet. (Ouch!) The white Syndicate boss, Mr. Vincent
(director Frost himself), gets the message. Soon a turf war
is raging in Watts, with the Mob and Koja's men retaliating
against each other in kind. Even though a number of people are
killed on both sides Gen. Ahmed remains oblivious to Koja's
intentions —
he's a goodhearted but pretty dumb guy, apparently. When Vito's
successor as top enforcer is ruthlessly assassinated, Vincent's
boys pack it in and quit the scene, leaving the ghetto to Koja
and company. Mad with power, Koja simply takes over Vincent's
role as crime boss. His "Black Gestapo", affecting
SS-style uniforms to be more "distinctive", not only
continue running hookers, drugs, and the numbers game but hit
up African-American business owners for protection money as
well. With cash pouring in hand-over-fist, Koja purchases a
fancy estate with a large adjoining compound, all the better
to entertain his officers' white lady friends in high style
and to train his growing army. (The sight of black guys in Nazi
uniforms, marching back and forth across a tennis court —
the "parade ground" —
is utterly ludicrous.) Ahmed eventually gets wind of what's
up and confronts Koja about his activities. They have an argument
over their differing philosophies ("You're
just a jive-ass n*gger!"
Ahmed finally concludes),
after which Koja orders his former mentor rubbed out. But Ahmed
survives the assassination attempt. With the Black Gestapo believing
him dead, Ahmed makes plans to destroy Koja's organization once
and for all.
Competently helmed despite a very low budget, The
Black Gestapo remains a laughable hunk of '70s cheese
due to its ridiculous plot, gutter-trawling script and bad (or
nonexistent) acting. All the white characters are thoroughly
despicable; women are either victims or whores (and often nude).
The idea that a black militant group would adopt the regalia
of the world's most notorious white supremacists is admittedly
wacko, but this element of the surreal only serves to keep one
watching. Brisk pacing helps; whenever the movie slows down
for pointless subplots (i.e., the white characters) director
Frost usually throws in naked women to keep the audience awake.
The action sequence that climaxes the film is hysterically bad...
Ahmed uses a rope and grappling hook to get over a 9-ft. chain
link fence, then deploys homemade, buckshot-firing scatter guns
to help even the odds! The movie's a stupid, sordid mess but
should prove interesting for trash movie fans.
In contrast, The Black
Six struggles to be entertaining even within the realm
of "So Bad It's Good" cinema. It stars professional
football players — each introduced
in the opening credits with their N.F.L. team listed below their
name — as a group of freespirited
Vietnam vets riding around the country on Triumph motorcycles,
living the gypsy life of the open road Then Came Bronson-style.
The San Francisco 49ers' Gene Washington has to carry the movie
as Bubba, saddled as he is with more lines than the other five
ballplayers combined. He isn't up to it.
After 5 years of war and living as a nomad,
Bubba decides to return to his hometown when he learns that
his younger brother Eddie's been murdered. His pals naturally
tag along with him for moral support. Bubba finds out that Eddie
was brutally killed by a racist motorcycle gang for dating a
white girl, the sister of the gang's leader, Moose (John Isenberger).
Getting no help from the local police, the Black Six eventually
run afoul of Moose's gang. Moose calls in the support of fellow
outlaw biker leader Thor (Conan
the Barbarian's Ben Davidson, also an ex-pro football
player), enlisting reinforcements to assemble a veritable biker
army. Bubba and his five homeboys accept Moose's challenge to
rumble, unaware of the overwhelming ambush planned for them.
For an action film, no matter how bad to
begin with, to save all the action scenes until the final ten
minutes is a serious mistake. Prior to
the big biker rumble at the climax,
The Black Six fills its running time with supposedly
poignant dramatic moments which are totally botched by amateur
performers spouting histrionic lines. There is some comedic
gold to be mined from these pretentious scenes —
notably when the peaceful, Zen-like Bubba has an intense discussion
with his gigantically-afroed sister, who makes Angela Davis
seem timid as a church mouse —
but it's not enough to keep one amused until the big finale.
That finale, by the way, is just as ineptly handled as everything
leading up to it. The Six circle their bikes like a wagon train
in a western while Moose and Thor's army of thugs ride down
the surrounding slopes to assault them. No one carries a gun;
it's all lead pipes, knives and chains... Even outnumbered 25
to 1 our heroes manage to prevail, as the bad guys attack them
piecemeal, four and five at a time. The whole thing goes on
for ten minutes straight, with a frantic funk guitar (heavy
on the wah-wah pedal) scratching nonstop in the background.
It's capped by the most ridiculous kamikaze motorcycle ride
ever seen, then the movie just... ends. (Finally!) A
caption is then emblazoned across the flame-licked screen: "HONKY,
LOOK OUT... HASSLE A BROTHER &
THE BLACK 6 WILL RETURN!" Fortunately we won't have
to endure Black Six II: Electric Boogaloo.
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transfers used for Diamond's double feature DVD are pretty bad.
Presented fullframe, they're fuzzy, dark and muddy, looking no
better than cheap EP-speed videotapes. Sound quality is significantly
better for both features, however. The attempt to include extras
on the disc is so pathetic as to be laughable —
there's a "Photo Gallery" consisting of a handful of
blurry screen captures from the films. 6/09/02 |
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