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Italy
- Spain / 1981
Directed by Bruno Mattei
Starring
Margit Evelyn Newton
Frank Garfield
Selan Karay
Color / 105 Minutes / Not Rated
Format: DVD (R1 - NTSC)
Anchor Bay Entertainment
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Blue
Underground reissue
(October 2007)
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Review
by
Brian Lindsey
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3
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6 |
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10
= Highest Rating |
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Hell of the Living Dead
(AKA Virus, alias
Night of
the Zombies)
a shameless knockoff of George Romero's 1978
classic Dawn of the Dead
is hack filmmaking as its most execrable, bold-faced
plagiarism of the worst possible kind. Every aspect
of this atrocious film smells worse than three-day
old roadkill. Nobody involved in its production
obviously gave a rat's ass about what they were
doing or the intellectual property they were violating.
Consequently, no one watching the film will give
a rat's ass about what's happening on the screen...
You'll be rooting for the zombies to not only
make a meal of the irritating, moronic characters,
but also director Bruno Mattei, his entire crew,
and the people who gave them the money to make
this atrocity. So why, you might ask, didn't I
rate this piece of dung as "Pure Dookie" i.e.
meriting only 1 rating point? True, I was sorely
tempted. The film probably deserves my harshest
possible condemnation. It is undeniably awful.
So awful, in fact, that I managed to squeeze a
few laughs out of the experience.
The ludicrous story opens at the Hope Center,
a high tech United Nations research facility in
Papua New Guinea. Here, away from the prying eyes
of the media, the U.N. is conducting "Operation
Sweet Death" a scientific means of ending human
overpopulation once and for all. This goal is
to be achieved by turning the underfed masses
of the Third World into flesh-munching zombies
who'll literally eat each other out of existence!
(Just what the rest of humanity is supposed to
do with the hordes of zombies thus unleashed was
apparently never considered.) Naturally the experiment
gets out of control. A technician investigating
a chemical leak is attacked by a zombified rat
(!) and horribly killed. (His partner just stands
there bug-eyed, not lifting a finger to help.
There's a lot of such behavior in this flick.)
The dying man accidentally trips a switch that
looses a cloud of toxic gas into the complex.
Lickety-split the other scientists and workers
are transformed into cannibalistic ghouls and
start attacking one another. The project's director
retreats to his office to make a tape recording
of his final report. "May God forgive us for
what we have produced here," he pleads, unconsciously
speaking for the filmmakers as well.
The scene then abruptly switches to an unidentified
European city, where eco-terrorists are holding
the staff of the American consulate hostage. The
terrorists demand that U.N. Hope Centers around
the globe be immediately shut down or the hostages
will be killed. A special Interpol SWAT team
all of four guys, who look like more window washers
than commandos ruthlessly swings into action,
quickly eliminating the terrorists and freeing
the captives. They can't rest on their laurels,
though. The team leader, hard case Lt. Mike London
(badly dubbed Piero Fumelli), tells his men that
a new assignment already awaits them they're
going to New Guinea on a secret mission. In the
blink of an eye they're transported there, traveling
by jeep through the jungle. (Actually Spain.)
But something's wrong. Unable to raise HQ on the
radio, Lt. London decides to press on.
The SWAT guys, of course, are headed for the
U.N. Hope Center on the island. En route they
encounter a great deal of stock footage (lifted
from a Japanese National Geographic-style
documentary), as well as pretty TV reporter Lia
(Margit Evelyn Newton) and her devoted cameraman
Max (Selan Karay, who resembles a Eurotrash version
of New Age composer Yanni). London wants to ditch
the pair but he can't; the jungle is infested
with zombies attacking anyone they encounter.
Lia winds up aiding the team by smoothing the
way with local natives. She does this by nonchalantly
stripping down to a thong and painting herself
with tribal colors, jogging barebreasted ahead
of the convoy. (This gonzo scene comes out of
nowhere, a ridiculously flimsy pretext to get
Newton out of her clothes.) The tribe's hospitality
is interrupted when their village is attacked
by a horde of the living dead. Lia, Max and the
commandos manage to escape, leaving the villagers
to become zombie chow. But further dangers not
to mention a lot more stock footage await the
group on their trek to the secret complex.
Hell of
the Living Dead
is one horrendously stinky movie. It's crass and
stupid, so much so that it's practically an insult
to the exploitation genre not an easy thing
to achieve. Some of the zombie makeup is actually
pretty good, but for the most part the flesh-hungry
ghouls are represented by black people powdered
to a pale hue and Caucasians made up in black
face. (What's up with that?) Gorehounds will probably
enjoy some of the over-the-top effects on display,
but in between zombie chomps there are long stretches
of the movie where not much is going on. Mattei
clumsily inserts so much stock 'nature' footage
that I temporarily forgot I was watching a horror
film instead of a program on Animal Planet.
(Marsupials, elephants, pelicans, fruit bats
All make cameos here, not to mention cranes with
gobbling sounds of turkeys dubbed over them!)
You certainly won't care one wit about the ultimate
fate of the characters. Everyone is a complete
idiot. Time and again people stand around doing
nothing while others are attacked. Even after
one of the SWAT team members Zantaro, the crazy
guy discovers the only way to put the zombies
down for good is to shoot 'em in the head (and
tells his comrades this), the commandos continue
to waste copious rounds of ammo blasting the ghouls
everywhere except in the noggin. Then Zantaro
himself inexplicably forgets this vital piece
of info!
Aside from the jungle motif, Hell
is such a rip-off of Dawn
of
the Dead that
in addition to characters, costumes, dialog
and even blocking (!) the memorable Goblin score
for Dawn is appropriated
in a desperate attempt to inject some badly needed
oomph. Instead it serves only to remind
the viewer how infinitely superior Romero's film
is in comparison. (Though the Italian rock group
does get onscreen credit here, I assume they'd
rather not.) A damning indictment indeed when
the best thing about a movie is something stolen
from another film! Still, there are a few things
here to make you laugh. The dialog contains a
number of choice howlers never quote
Gandhi to Lt. London and some of the zombies
are pretty darn goofy. (One featured zombie walks
like he's twirling an invisible Hoola Hoop around
his waist.) There's also a vomiting scene that
had me guffawing. One extremely bizarre sequence
has a SWAT guy prancing around in a tutu he finds
in an abandoned house. I am not kidding.
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Anchor
Bay, in keeping with its reputation for quality,
treats Hell of
the Living Dead
far better than it deserves. Anamorphically enhanced
for 16x9 TVs, the widescreen presentation is a tremendous
improvement over any previous VHS version. The same
can be said for the disc's Digital Mono audio track.
Can you believe there are Extras with this thing?
An insert booklet contains 2 pages of liner notes
by Fangoria editor Michael Gingold and director
Scooter McCrae, who gleefully rag on the film. ("HELL...
is this movie.") A 9-minute video interview
with Bruno Mattei has the director discussing both
Hell and Rats:
Night of Terror, an early '80s "Road
Warrior Meets Willard" rip-off that for some
reason he seems mildly proud of. Mattei, speaking
in English-subtitled Italian, comes off exactly
like the disingenuous hack he is. But at least the
interview segments are humorously intercut with
some of the more outrageous scenes from the two
films. Rounding out the disc are an image gallery
of posters/production stills and the spoiler-laden
theatrical trailer. 2/07/02 |
| UPDATE
The AB disc reviewed here is going OOP in 2007.
On October 30, 2007 Blue Underground is reissuing
the title using the same transfer and on-disc extras. |
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